Thursday, August 22, 2013

WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH!


Most of us know that oldie but a goodie saying, "When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going." Wow, this brings back memories from childhood. It was a common quote or phrase used when I was growing up. While so simple, and seemingly basic, it inspires so much motivation and wisdom. It's not so much that one has to be a "tough" person or exhibit some kind of "tough" persona, but rather what we all muster up within ourselves when we need to survive, be resilient, endure, rise to the occasion, make life-altering decisions, or ride the current of life. 

I read a recent blog post that inspired the idea in me to take the quote, "When the going gets tough..." and think about all the things one could or would do to finish off the quote. Or, to think about how you would respond, when the going gets tough. You can even turn it into a game!

 How many ways can you change this old saying?  Here are a few ideas:

When the going gets tough…the professional/grown-up gets help.
How many times have I seen this situation.  There’s a big mess, and someone will hunker down and try to figure it out or resolve it themselves.  They’re like an angry child protecting a toy yelling, “mine!  Get away!”  There are a couple of things going on here.  You’ve got a control freak who thinks they’re smarter than everyone else and if we’d all just leave them alone, they’d fix it. Or someone who feels that if the problem comes to light, they’ll get blamed for it and they don’t want anyone to see.  Either way, you’re dealing with someone who cares more about being right than getting a good result.  Grownups know that a team pulling together without big egos can produce much more powerful results than a single person or a really small team working off in a corner on their own.  Yes, it might take more effort to coordinate across a bigger group, and yes, compromises may be required.  But the outcome will almost always be a stronger, longer lasting, and more widely accepted solution.

When the going gets tough…it’s time to follow your gut and heart.
When things aren’t going well and we feel besieged, often we try to ‘think’ our way through.  We re-examine the evidence, pour over our well-laid plans, look at the numbers, and try to plot the logical route through the minefield.  In an effort to come up with the answers, we sometimes forget to check in with our best on-site consultants, our gut and our heart.  Creative answers don’t always lie in the data.  Sometimes what a situation calls for is a dose of intuition.  I speak with so many clients who have decades of experience, yet they doubt the ingrained inner knowing that has accumulated over the years.  Listening to your gut can yield some great out-of-the box creative thinking.  In some circumstances if you slow down, breath, and listen to your heart, that voice of truth will tell you that the situation or path you’re on doesn’t fit your life anymore.  It’s time to make a change, and whatever problem you’re trying to solve is not the real problem.  People seldom arrive at that moment of truth through thinking – it’s something they need to feel

When the going gets tough…it’s time to laugh.
One of my most endearing and beloved memories of the time my Dad died was how we, as a family, found and enjoyed humor up to the end.  Waiting in the pre-op area of the hospital before the surgery to remove my Dad’s esophagus (He had esophageal cancer.), Dad joked, “what am I doing?  I feel fine.  I don’t have any symptoms.”  When his surgeon, the epitome of cranky bedside manner, came in to chat, Dad repeated this comment.  His surgeon, with an absolute deadpan face and voice said, “then we’re gonna give you some. “ Mom, Dad, and I laughed so hard.  I think other people in the area thought we were nuts.  Were we running away from how scared we were feeling?  Perhaps, but it helped me deal with what turned out to be one of the last conversations with my father.  I love it that we laughed at such a time.



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